ajft

Its a Friday, crap customer service from not one, but two different companies.

Ascension Records 1, Australia Post nil

Three weeks ago I bought a CD boxed set from Ascension Records, two days later the purchase appeared on my credit card and I thought no more about it. Yesterday my VISA bill arrived and I thought the CD was taking a bit long so I called them up, yep, ordered on the 2nd, shipped on the 8th. Chase it up with the local Post Office.

Oh no, here we go….

I called the Oakleigh South Post Office on North road since that's where parcels always went in the past, apparently they no longer take parcels for the suburb of Oakleigh, these go to Oakleigh Post Office but I need to call a central number — 131318 — to track the parcel.

Called 131318 and played voice-mail menus then get to speak to a brusque operator who asks for my "tracking number". Since it was an ordinary parcel I don't have one. She's sorry, but they can't do anything "try contacting your local Post Office but they can only do a limited search". Then tried to up-sell me their courier services for "future parcels" and basically told me I shouldn't send parcels by parcel post if I want them delivered.

Hung up and tried to locate the phone number for Oakleigh Post Office, but apparently I have to call 131318 and talk to the central customer circus operators. So I did.

Described the problem again, gave my name and address, again, and after a wait they tell me they'll transfer directly to Oakleigh Post Office so I can discuss it with them. Once I'm transferred "Carmel" expresses surprise that Customer Service has sent me directly to the Oakleigh Post Office since calls like mine are meant to be handled by Customer Service.

Described the problem again, gave my name and address, again, there's some hunting around and “there's nothing here for you” and since I didn't have it sent registered mail there's nothing they can do for me. I explained that several times over the past five years we've had parcels left on the doorstep or dumped on top of the letter box and I suspect this may have happened, got the “that shouldn't happen” statement again and explained that while I'm fully aware that “that shouldn't happen” it does happen and it appears that nothing is ever done about it. Once again got fobbed off with that excuse beloved of any public or semi-public service “they're contractors not employees, blah blah blah.” A wave of the magic contractor stick and apparently the people employing the contractor either don't bother to put any conditions in the contract, or the contractor isn't required to obey the conditions of the contract, or nobody bothers to enforce the conditions of the contract.

My only option now is apparently to fill out a generic customer complaint form, available from any Post Office, where it will be sent off to Australia Post headquarters and “they will look into it.” Even if they do condescend to refund the cost of the goods, any and all refunds go to the sender and I then have to chase up with the sender to get a replacement item!

So I did fill out the form, and so I wait….

Updates:

1. 2010-Apr-16 16:00: Australia Post have finished their investigation and have confirmed that yes indeed, my parcel has vanished. “Any further searches for this article would require the sender call the Customer Contact Centre or lodge a customer service complaint form providing all relevant details.” The part the really irritates is that “In the event that the article has been lost, the sender would be entitled to claim compensation.”. So I pay for the original item and I spend a month chasing it up when it doesn't arrive, but the sender is the one who can get compensated and effectively gets paid twice for the one item! It gets left up to the sender's better nature to provide recompense to the receiver.

Ikea and Kings Couriers

We need a wardrobe. Simple isn't it? Since we only have a small car we'd like it delivered too please. How hard could that be? Perhaps you think we could peruse a catalogue, order online, pay by credit card and have it delivered. Nice idea, what fantasy land do you live in?

The only place we could find what we wanted was Ikea, they're quite happy to let you browse online, fill in a "shopping cart" and prepare a list of what you want, and they'll give you all the details about the home delivery — but then the kicker. The bastards won't let you order online, in order to maximise impulse purchasing you have to visit the store, walk around selecting it all yourself, pay for it, then lug it to the home delivery counter to fill out the forms and let them deliver it the next day. At least they let you print out the "shopping cart" contents so you have a list of what you need to get.

OK, so we went to Ikea in Richmond and spent a thrilling hour or so grabbing boxed wardrone bits off shelves and putting them on recalcitrant shopping trolleys.

By the way Ikea, here's a suggestion: take a look at your customers and get some signs put up in Vietnamese and Mandarin! A huge proportion of your customers there do not speak much english and would really be helped if they could find what they want.

Several hundred kilograms of flat-pack boxes later we find that we need two trolleys, not to mention that if I were to touch any one of the boxes at work I'd get told off for OHS reasons, apparently a 30-40kg box is fine if the customer has to lift it, but not staff! I have no idea how they get around the law-suits for back injuries.

We selected, we lugged, we paid, we queued, we got it lined up for delivery today, Friday, somewhere between 12:00 and 18:00. Left two phone numbers and was assured we'd be called a couple of hours prior to delivery to narrow the time down.

Sometime around 23:00 on Thursday night there was an SMS on Jo's phone telling us that the stuff would be delivered between 14:00 and 16:00 — I guess that means they've loaded the truck and know where its all going then.

So Jo spent the entire afternoon hanging around at home, waiting… waiting… Of course there was no call from Kings, there never is, all the delivery firms seem to promise to call but then never do. By 16:30 she called up the office and eventually go through to someone who promised to call the driver and then call her back. By 17:30 she decided that the call back wasn't going to happen and tried again. By now all the phones went unanswered because the staff go home at 5pm on a Friday.

Eventually around 18:00 we got through and were told that “the Melbourne truck is running late” — wow, I think Sherlock Holmes could figure that one out — “it will be late but should be there by 7pm”. We asked if it was going to be delivered even if it was later than 7pm and were assured that yes it was definitely going to be delivered this evening.

Well it's now 9:30pm, we've still not heard from the driver and there's still no sign of the 2-4pm delivery.

http://www.kingstransport.com.au/

“We deliver what we promise”

Um, sorry guys. NO YOU BLOODY WELL DON'T. Not only that, but you don't call up and you don't let us know what you are doing.

Updates:

1. 2010-Feb-27 09:30: Fifteen minutes on hold and we finally get through on the phone. Kings Courier reception staff has no idea what is happening (her words), there is no information on when, or even if, or delivery will take place. She is unable to contact the driver, only the supervisor can do this — but the supervisor isn't there. The supervisor should be in the office around about noon. They have promised to call us back immediately after noon — when the supervisor arrives — in order to let us know when they will deliver yesterday's furniture.
2. 2010-Feb-27 13:20: The phone rings, a gruff voice states “This is Ikea, your furniture will be delivered in forty-five minutes, goodbye.” I guess that was the supervisor, no idea, doesn't quite seem just after noon to me. On the plus side, this is the first time that they have actually called us when they said they would.
3. 2010-Feb-27 14:15: Almost exactly twenty four hours after it was booked, our delivery turns up. Three guys with almost Marx-brothers comic effect as they stumble about getting in each others' way, each one slowly and cumbersomely carrying inside a box that could have been carried safely and quickly by two. Banging into the walls, the door, the furniture and each other. At least we finally got the furniture and we're finally rid of Kings and their delivery so-called “service.”

Now that definitely leaves a bad taste in the mouth Mr Garmin.

You purchase a GPS in good faith, one that comes with a 12 month warranty and so when it breaks you send it back to be repaired. You can't send it to Garmin since they don't have a presence in Australia, instead you have to send it to GME, who are the “sole repair and distribution centre.”

When it comes back you assume that the replacement one has a warranty, then nine or ten months later that one breaks too... that's when you discover that according to GME “they're not real reliable,” but since its a repair unit it only has a 3 month warranty and it'll cost you $AU209 to have your unrepairable GPS replaced! Staff at GME claim to be "only a repair shop" and that I have to discuss it with "Garmin Australia" if I'm not happy with the warranty, or that fact that two out of two Garmin devices have failed in under a year.

Searching about shows that there is no such entity as "Garmin Australia", all references to a Garmin presence in Australia are directed straight back to GME! Garmin's "international office" in the US won't help, since I'm not in the US, and helpfully directed me to contact Garmin South-East Asia, which have a website in Taiwan that is solely in Chinese characters.

So two years of endless firmware hangs and two broken Edge 305 GPSs can be summarised as: nice concept, crap product, crap firmware, crap warranty and crap support.

Thanks Garmin.

Thread: last next

A courier arrived this morning and brought me a shiny new replacement Edge 305 GPS to replace the one that broke back in January.

At one month and one day Garmin are twice as responsive as Canon for repairs — last year's warranty headache — but I'm still not really impressed that it takes that long for them to send a replacement unit, I would have thought they would keep them in stock. Apparently not, I was told that they order them in when a faulty one comes in for repair. I'll be keeping track of the dates since I'm fairly sure that Australian law says I get my warranty period extended if I'm without it for more than a week. Here's hoping I don't need the warranty though!

All excited at the new arrival, I powered it on, got it synchronised with the satellites, then put it in my pocket and rode to work — no replacement mounting bracket was sent. Unfortunately I was too excited, forgetting that unlike a normal bike speedometer I was supposed to press the Start button, so when I got to work I discovered that I had travelled exactly zero (duh!) miles (ugh!). At least I've set it up now so that it reads in metric like the rest of the civilised world.

Another phone call to GME and I can get a replacement bracket, but I have to post in the damaged one. They'll also find out if I can buy a third one to put on the third bicycle....

Thread: last next

Surprise, surprise, BP hasn't replied to my email, despite the assurance that they would do so within five working days. I'll try a written enquiry tomorrow...

A Bund dinner at Mexicali Rose. Despite the photo being solely of beer and other beverages, we did have food as well.

Well, after being shouted at yesterday, I've sent off my enquiry to Mr BP asking them to explain themselves and tell me exactly which law it is that requires me to dismount from my bike before filling it…

Thank you for communicating with BP Australia. Your feedback will help us to provide a more valuable, responsive, and reliable internet service in future. A customer service representative will respond within 5 working days.

Ladies and gentlemen, place your bets on whether they will respond within 5 working days, or whether they'll be like the last bank I wrote to who never responded. On the other hand, maybe 5 working days is four calendar months…

It was wet, it was cold, it was miserable, and all I wanted to do was to fill my bike with petrol on the way home. I called in to the BP service station on Ferntree Gully Rd, the same as I'd done any number of times in the past. Pulled up to the pump and put the nozzle in the tank, waiting for the pump to be switched on... and waited... and waited...

Eventually the attendant walked up from his counter to the door and stood there and shouted at me that I had to get off the bike. I asked why. “It's the law he,” shouted. I asked what law. “It's the law, in case you spill petrol on yourself, catch fire and sue us,” he shouted. I asked what law. He told me it was “the law,” and to “get off the bike.”

I told him to get stuffed, put the keys back in the ignition, and rode off to the next nearest servo, where not only was the petrol 2c a litre cheaper, where I could be served sitting on the bike the same as for the last sixteen years, but where I could have a friendly chat with the owner.

Congratulations BP, that's one less customer.